i could definiely say that some people could appreciate me in their own way. but as of now. those whom i want to appreciate me. turn their backs. aba pake ko. i shouldn't really care or anything. especially that even if i try to show them i care, they wouldn't bother to ask.
life could suck, BIG TIME. but then you realize that there are people here who friggin loves you. so maybe, im the one not appreciating. so i guess i do, make that mistake too.
i sucked this week.
first off, we made chocolates for our NSTP requirement. we selled all we could. naubos nga actually. but now, we dont know what to do. HAHAHA. e pano, kami lang yung nagbenta. sbi nila 2nd sem pa daw yun. or whatever.
then tuesday, we had a psych quiz. which really sucked because i didn't review much and sir pauls favorite hobby, was not there. indi siya nagbigay ng additional points for that quiz. sucks for me. ara actually got a higher grade than i did.
and for next week, super duper daming requirements and stuff.
oh crap. i didnt even get to buy my mom a birtdhay present for sunday. kasi ive been working for these people who never paid me. great huh?!
plus. im still happy.
because i am back to communicating with mae. and rynah.
i really can't take my mind of that time van gave me words i wouldn't ever regret hearing. (or reading that is)
"if thats really the case now, kung ganyan na tlga ugali nila, just accept the fact na ganun na tlga, dun ka nlng mag focus sa pinapahalagahan ka at yung totoo sayo, friendship is not based on how many u have, but how the friendship is really strong kahit na nagkakagulo may innitiative parin magkaayos.. at binibilang yung totoo ndi yung mga taong kaya ka lang iwan at saktan, ndi sila worth para sayo, find ur gold. those true golds u have.. and just focus on them.. ayt"
strong words could make me really realize a lot of things. believe me, right after she said that, bumalik ako sa mga taong alam kong pinapahalagahan ako. i communicated with mae again. even thought she's in australia. i called rynah, and i talked to mark! and i dont regret doing that. they are the gold.
sila trish may have been my friends. and madami kami e. uh. all 13 of us?! (including dbb). and all teh effort i did. was quite nothing to them. actually all the effort me and marvin did for her. ang niyakap niya was those. err. hahaha. i love them and all. but, i'm happier with those who appreciate me and i appreciate back. i need those who need me back. that's all i want and need. she called me up yesterday, and kuya was using the phone. all i heard was "pau, i'm back". i told her i'd call her back. but i never did. i feel quite guilty. but i had my reasons. there wasn't anything left anymore. wala na akong ears to listen to her crap. her crap that ive been listening to. and everytime i needed her to listen, she had to say something about the crap again. i guess im just fed up. that's all. i'm still here for her, all i needed was for her to realize that i was slipping away already. and maybe until now, she doesn't realize that. on day she will...
and then i'll be happy all the way. both of us will be happy. <3
[pau]